How One Family Got Help for Their Son’s Disrespect

Is you church a Parent Training Center? Three Biblical Principles Drive a Church to Become a Parent Training Center. We focused on the first principle in a previous article. These three biblical principles drive every church to become a Parent Training Center. Before we get to that, let me tell you that we launch the Parent Training Center Initiative next week. We'll be spreading the word for the next couple of months. As part of this launch, our Blogger Team will be hosting 3 great giveaways over the coming weeks. The first has just gotten started and includes some wonderful resources for your church to use in equipping parents. Be sure to read all the way to the end of this article and enter the giveaway.
Let's take a moment to review the theological foundations of this initiative.

Principle #1: The discipleship mandate includes helping people apply the scriptures to their roles and relationships in family life.

The Great Commission Discipleship mandate from Christ himself. Jesus left us with a mission. He said, “I want you to make disciples of all nations…teaching them to do all that I commanded you.” (Matthew 28:19-20)

The second principle has to do with a parent’s role. It’s true that the church has a responsibility to disciple children. It’s part of the discipleship mandate. But it’s the parents who have the primary responsibility to be the spiritual trainers of their children. We'll focus on this principle in a future article. 

Principle #2: Parents are the primary spiritual trainers of their children.

The third principle has to do with parenting methodology. It’s all about the heart. God wanted Samuel to find a new king to replace King Saul. As Samuel looked around at the prospects, he thought God would choose Eliab because he was tall and handsome. It was in that moment that God spoke to Samuel and said, “Man looks on the outward appearance but the Lord looks on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)

Principle #3: Parents must use heart-based strategies to reach their children for the long-term.

We Need Help!
Bill and Karen were distraught with the continual disrespect they were seeing in their twelve-year-old son. “We need help,” they decided, and they got just what they needed. The new ideas changed the way they worked with their son and turned his attitude around faster than they could have imagined. In fact, they wished they would have sought help earlier, but they kept trying different consequences hoping something would work. Here’s what happened.

Where Will Parents Get Help? 
When Kevin turned eleven his parents started seeing a change. His resistance with chores and doing simple things they asked took the form of sighing and complaining. Most every interaction Bill and Karen had with their son was becoming a challenge. By the time he was twelve, he seemed to be more bold in his disrespect, making unkind comments that weighed on their relationship.

Bill and Karen realized that things were going in the wrong direction and they needed help. Their church had become a Parent Training Center a few months earlier and offered tools and advice for parents. They decided to check it out. 

Pastor Bob gave them three ways to get parenting advice. They could start receiving weekly email parenting tips, read one of the recommended books on parenting, or they could join the weekly parenting small group. Bill and Karen decided to do all three. 

Once in the group they learned about a different approach than consequences. They talked about the heart. Bill and Karen knew that the heart is important and they wanted to connect to their son’s heart, but they didn’t know how. They were skeptical at first, thinking that it simply meant more dialogue with their son. 

Attitudes are a Heart Issue
But as they continued to read and learn, they discovered that the attitude in their son was based on two things inside the heart. One was beliefs and the other was emotions. They realized that Kevin didn’t know how to communicate his emotions well and he had some beliefs that needed some adjusting.

As Dad and Mom shared their new insight with their son, he was resistant at first, but then began to come around. As they talked with him they discovered two beliefs that needed changing. First, it seemed that he believed that work was to be avoided at all cost. Somehow he believed that his job description in life was to have fun.

They gave Kevin more work and challenged him to have a good attitude while doing it. Some of the tasks were chores around the house and others were projects he and his dad worked on together. In both cases, Kevin was getting the idea that work and his response to it was important.

You Can Change What Kids Believe
Secondly, Kevin seemed to think that if he was unhappy about something, he had the right to express it. Dad and Mom decided to address this truth in a different way. They had learned about honor at the small group and how parents were teaching their kids in positive ways to add energy to the emotional climate in relationships. This positive approach seemed to touch Kevin as they talked about bringing customer service into the home.

Within just a few weeks, Bill and Karen were seeing significant changes in their son. Instead of complaining and resisting, he was trying to respond better. The good news though, is that these parents were learning that if those current strategies didn’t work, there were many others that would. The heart-based approach provided them new insight and ideas that replaced the reward/punishment model they had relied on.

Bill and Karen, like so many other parents, are growing because their church has chosen to disciple parents in what a heart-based approach to parenting is all about. Many parents today are realizing that they don’t have the best tools and the models they grew up with left empty spaces in their parenting strategies.

Your Can Help Your Church Disciple Parents
When a church becomes a Parent Training Center, they acknowledge their role in the discipleship of parents. Christians need and want to work out their faith in practical ways. God designed the church to be that vehicle where discipleship takes place. If you’d like to help your church become a Parent Training Center, get involved with the Parent Training Center program provided by the National Center for Biblical Parenting. They will help you know what steps to use to move your church forward.

We're now offering an "Early Adopter" Discount worth $50.00 OFF the initial fee for the first 20 churches that sign up. You'll find the code right on the web page where you sign up.

A Parent Training Center is a church that intentionally trains parents, providing resources and tools both for discipleship of believers and for evangelism to families in the community.
The National Center for Biblical Parenting offers resources, and practical support to help you become the Parent Training Center God designed. The Equipping Program contains a number of mobilization tools to help you advance to the next level in your parent discipleship ministry.

With this program you'll interact with experts as well as other pastors and church leaders. Receive personalized guidance for your unique church situations. Use resources that will equip your parents to reach their children's hearts.

Parent Training Center Giveaway for Churches

To introduce your church to the Parent Training Center concept, we are hosting an awesome giveaway that includes some of our best church and parent training resources, along with a $100 gift certificate to the National Center for Biblical Parenting store. Here's what your church could win: 

Parenting Is Heart Work DVD Church Kit ($199.95 value)

Equip parents to touch the hearts of their kids with this biblically-based, practical training program. Parents and teachers of children 2-18 years will benefit from this life-changing curriculum. The Parenting is Heart Work Church Kit includes: • Eight 35-minute video sessions • A Leader's Guide with reproducible pages for attendees • A copy of the 256 page book Parenting is Heart Work
The videos were filmed before a live audience of parents and children. Using drama, Bible stories, and lots of illustrations, Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN will energize you and provide you with tools you need to strengthen your family. Use this eight-part video series in your church, small group, or even in your own family. Many times parents have to change the way they parent in order for children to change the way they live.

The Family Toolbox DVD Church Kit ($179.95 value)

The Family Toolbox has 8 lessons for parents, teens, or both in a small group setting. Each one has a 1-2 minute scene of a family living life and experiencing common challenges in their relationships. A discussion guide prompts dialogue among parents and a 10-minute teaching session featuring Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN gives practical tools to use right away.
As the group works through the lessons parents learn:
• How to focus on the heart instead of just behavior • The cues you give that tell your children when you mean business • Practical ways to remove conflict from the problems of family life • How to end correction times with impact • A tool for maximizing heart change in the correction process • The value of teaching kids to accept no as an answer • Ways to reduce anger episodes in children
The Family Toolbox is designed for families with children ten years old and up and is an excellent resource for small groups. Each lesson can be done in 20-30 minutes, but could also lead to discussion and dialogue lasting an hour or more.

Coupon to purchase resources in the NCBP Store ($100 value)

To enter, please use the Rafflecopter below. a Rafflecopter giveaway Terms and Conditions: This giveaway is open to residents of the U. S. only.  Void where prohibited by law. Must be at least 18 years of age. This giveaway is in no away associated with Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, or Pinterest.. No purchase necessary for entry. Odds are determined by the number of entries. Selected winner will have 48 hours to respond to email notification to claim their prize or another winner will be drawn.  Entrants to this giveaway will be added to the email list for the National Center of Biblical Parenting.

Milan Tomic

Hi. I’m Designer of Blog Magic. I’m CEO/Founder of ThemeXpose. I’m Creative Art Director, Web Designer, UI/UX Designer, Interaction Designer, Industrial Designer, Web Developer, Business Enthusiast, StartUp Enthusiast, Speaker, Writer and Photographer. Inspired to make things looks better.

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